Gabourey Sidibe

Look, I'm going to be honest with you. If you don't want to be friends with Gabourey Sidibe then your parents definitely dropped you on your head as a baby. More than once.

She hosted Saturday Night Live last night and this was one of my favorite skits of hers.  Even as this old lady, the let's-hang-out-and-be-friends-ness of her shines through. 



I also love how on the Oscars red carpet she said it was like "prom for hollywood."  And check out the first thirty seconds of her Ellen interview with that dance, which she later said her friend choreographed with her in case she was ever a guest on Ellen's show.



But the best story of all is when Billy Bush of [whatever annoying celebrity-obsessed "news" show] was interviewing her on the Oscars red carpet and they were talking about attractive actor Gerard Butler who was approaching.  Gabourey (not realizing he was there) says to Bush about Butler "I'd hit that!"

I almost peed my pants out of sheer hilarity right then, but Billy Bush misses this comment and brings Butler over.  Then you can tell a producer recounts the comment to Bush because he puts his hand to his ear and says "What?  No she didn't." Then Bush asks Gabourey to repeat her comment in front of Butler and so she does.  They end the exchange with her joking that they should get a bottle of champagne and see where the night goes.  Totally classic.

I feel a little like I just retold a story from seventh grade recess but just watch the video, ok?

Glorious Gabourey
Knows the supreme thing to say
True talent, it's been said
But it never goes her head.

Ke$ha

I think the legacy of my generation (and plus or minus a little depending on how strict you are with your generational qualifications) is going to be the blurring of borders.  We don't just talk on the phone, we text while talking and blackberry messengering while driving.  We don't just eat, we eat and walk around and talk and drive.  (I'm not sure why all of this involves driving, I guess we really have places to go.)

I am so overstimulated that I hate taking a shower because it is so darn boring.  I have to have a new mix on my iPod or turn on NPR to get through it.  I must watch TV or surf the net while I'm eating and while I'm studying I won't even tell you the multiple other things I do.  There is an actual commercial now about kids who eat standing up and the (fake) discrimination they face.  Who wants to eat standing up?   That is just stupid.  How are you supposed to balance the TV remote if you are walking around.

This extreme multi-tasking is great sometimes, but I fear it has gotten out of control.  For me, the real problems start when you forget the original task that you are attempting to conquer.  No one better personifies this than the "singer" Ke$ha.  I love her songs, they are the kind of songs you play while doing other things (getting ready to go out, driving with the windows down, and, for me, showering.)  She was the musical guest on the last Saturday Night Live and she put on a crazy performance with lights and costumes and effects and dancing.  She showed off her creative side (which is apparently not bound by our establishment concept of a 26 letter alphabet.)

But there's just one problem, she can't sing.  Should we be concerned about this?  Check it out for yourself.






Ke$ha (pronounced Keh-sha)
You're a multitasking mesha.
Your neon tribal body-drawings didn't quite distract
From your tinny voice in your talentless act.

Justin Time To Feel Old

Ok, could I feel any older?

'Cause frankly, I'm not that old.  I never had a Commodore 64 and I am not old enough to have an original opinion about Reganomics.  I know who Tutti and Jo are but I think mostly from reruns.  I did have a crush on Alex P. Keaton but I'm a red blooded American female so what do you expect?

But here's the problem: what the heck is with this Justin Bieber kid?  I really and truly want to dislike him.  First of all, what is with that hair?  This is not an uncommon hairdo for young dudes these days and I cannot imagine why that is.  I call it the che-hairy because their head looks mostly round and juicy like a big piece of fruit.

Aside from the ridiculous hair, he is disturbingly mature for his age.  And I happen to know from years of interaction and watching TV that males don't mature quickly so this must be an act.  I just find it creepy that he is 16 and hitting on thirty-something women.  Seriously, am I old or what?

Che-hairy:

Choosing to chop your locks

So they sway like soft grass in a field

And then set like a circular cherry.

Seth Meyers

Now that I have discussed several guys in a row that I think are cute, I think it is only fair for a total change of pace.  Today I will talk about someone who I do not think is cute.  At all.  Not in the way meaning attractive and particularly not in the way that means funny.  His only job is to write for the Weekend Update and I am totally unimpressed with the majority of his jokes.  Also he has this annoying deadpan look that says "you can tell by the humor that I have just made a joke, you don't need to see it on my face."   Yea, Seth, we do.

SNL writer Seth Meyers.
Not my favorite of Lorne Michaels' hires.
Giving us his deadpan stare.
But it doesn't work when the humor's not there.