Confidential Letter

Dear Retailers,

Look, I didn't want to get anyone in trouble about this so let's just keep it between you and me.  I understand that the economy sucks and people are in a generally blah mood which makes them feel less shop-y.  I feel for you, I really do.  But did you need to start Christmas so early?  At the beginning of November?

I really think you may have jumped the gun on this one.  I mean you skipped Thanksgiving all together.  I am telling you this now though it is too late to change anything because frankly we are friends and I thought you should know people were talking.  Ever since college when my roommate Annie showed me the joys of shopping I have really felt that you and I had something special going on.  I could not just forget what we have and go on without saying anything.

Now you know that your desperation is showing a bit, I hope we can move past this and you can pull it together for Black Friday.

Sincerely,

You know who

Holidays
Celebration.  Remembrance.
Sharing, eating, decorating
Attached to specific months.
Festival